Sometimes I have similar feelings. But numerology doesn't have calculations related to how a person feels.

What may help is to become familiar with your personal numerology chart.

Get a free numerology reading. The reading doesn't interpret all aspects of a person's chart, but it does interpret the energies of the core numbers, which generally are at the top of importance.

Also use the essence transit tool and read the essence transit article so you have information about how to interpret the essence transit letters and numbers.

There are dozens of free online numerology tools and calculators that may interest you.